Chuck's Truck Got Stuck, What Luck

Holy crepe, if Bad Luck's a fighting game, my combo would place me first in the top score, unless the guy who rides the blue, 3 wheeled car in Mr Bean decides to have a go :

I feel you bro

I don't remember walking under ladders, or coming across thirteen black cats.
Hodamn, then whyyy.

I still remember the other day, on my friend's birthday barbecue, Azman.
HAPPYY BIRTHDAY BRO ! :D

Anyways,


Bad hair days didn't seem to end yet, well nothing unusual about that, I know Bob have seen better days, altho it usually doesn't last very long. But that's only the tip of the iceberg.

FYI , I've very bad eyesight. The only thing that's available to let me see the world for the day were my expired contact lenses. WHICH, the right side suddenly turned super dry in the evening, leaving me with only one side to work with. For the icing, it was Labour's Day, and my usual optic center was closed (y) & (r) .

Now for the cherry on top of the icing,

The left one fell off right before the party.

...I love my life.

That left me to see everything horribly pixelated for the rest of the day. Like I'm in a bad NES game or something.

Example :

With my lenses,

WANNA BE ON TOP..of me ?


Without the lenses,

In this case, I would be glad that I can't see him/her/herm.
But other than that, I wanna see sunsets and rainbows clearly :(


Then for the barbecue, most of the chickens that I grilled turned pitch black on one side. Except for the sausages, that I smeared loads of ghee on it before grilling, those were scrumptious.

But in the end, how fun the night turned out to be kinda made me forget all about the mishaps :)


And this one happened today,

We first wanted to go to Murni, damn it was closed,

Kam Hyong, it's closed too.

We finally settled for Utara.

Where my order came when everyone's already done with their meals. But that's okay, the soup's good.

THIS MADE MY DAY,

The moment I wanted to get up, my thumb drive (which I hung 'round my neck) got stuck on the table, making the table tilt down, sending almost everything on the table crashing down.

Holy f-k..

All eyes darted on me that instant. Time stood still. Out of the death of all functionality of thought due to the death stroke of Major Embarrassment (it's like villain's name or something, might be featured in Brainsorbet one day, who knows (; ), I walked straight to the car like a jerk without helping them to pick up the scattered plates and glasses. Damn I felt bad :/ .

I'm sorry for my badluck's infectious Eddy, as he reversed the car and hit a motorcycle, which fell on another motorcycle, which fell on another motorcycle. Like dominos. Damnn.

I'm starting to miss my ex, Lady Luck. Come back to me darlin' .

I can ramble on, but it's just gonna sound like a complaint letter to God. I am thankful, yes I am. My tummy's not growlin, and my lungs still pumpin. But, but, I just need to get back with Lady Luck. I mishhh her.

What Worries Me Is Whatever's Watery

As of 25th Of April 2009

HOOOOOOOOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHH (!),
BLUBBUbubublublublulub *sinks in underwater



Today's been wet and wowesome, and wild (I'm dedicating this to Bob) . WE WENT TO A WATERWALLL, I mean, waterfall. And the waterwall got on fire.
(Alright, you may ignore this paragraph, all filled with inside jokes)

Ho man, haven't been to a waterfall, for ages. Went to my last one when I'm still allowed to play in Ikea's playhouse. And it had a big fat diaper floating on it, holy f-k, and I almost drowned out of a little underestimation. Or maybe a lot. The next best thing I could do to experience a waterfall, was to close my eyes, flush a toilet and let my imagination run free (r).

Enough about that.

Someone said with a very Ketat face,

"Esok jumpa pukul 8.30 kau tau, bukan bangun pukul 8.30. Kau lambat, aku tinggal. Serious ni"

Turned out, I did wake up at 8.30, wait I think it was 8.40, and that was, e-early o.o . Thanks Eddy for waking me up with your "Wei kau dah siap ke belum ni ?"

Apu, or formerly known as Acap Myvi, picked me up. Homaigod, wasn't it nice to see him after so, sooo-h long :)

Gathered at Fariz Advanced before we moved out.

Little highlights of the journey :

The thingy on top of Zai's Kembara's car door, I think it's called a visor, frikkin fell off, in the middle of the highway. Nice double-sided tapin' Macgyver. The moment I saw the thing came off, whipped up my phone and texted him :

FAIL


..twice, as moments after that, Azman took another one in.


Somewhere along the journey, we took a short pit-stop to enjoy the view of a beautiful, crystal-blue water filled dam.






Damn, the dam was damned gorgeous. Damnnnn~

Not long after that, after crossing the metal bridge, we're finally there :


Rombongan Surau 4B


The sight of clear waters rushing through the rocks, plus the sound of the steady torrents splashing down.
Beats flushing toilets by 9998989 miles.



Highlights :

The cold stream against the skin, contradicting the hot sun was ah-mazing <3

How an emo(pshheahh -_-) dood, transformed to a fully-qualified Din the burger stall vendor with just one quick splash.

From this :



To this :





There's a part where there was a mini waterfall where you can just lay your back, or head against it for a free Ogawa session of mother nature.


One side of Mior's flip-flops swam away,


Muka hilang selipar


With the remaining one


How can you bathe in a river, without playing skipping stones. Could've done it all day

Cannonball into the water ? , flawless.

A jumping split ? , flawl-KYAKKKKKKKK (!!)

...As the pants ripped a giant hole near my crotch ever so gracefully.

10, 10 , 9.9

The water near the big waterfall was DEEEEH-P . And I don't know what lead me, Faye and Azman towards it. The next thing we know, we were all splishing sploshing trying to get to the surface. Amidst the struggle, I felt someone's back and I pushed him up to the surface, then later swam myself through the shallower part.

Then,

Azman : Eh kau eh yg tolak aku naik tadi ?
Me : Err, entah aku main tolak orang naik je tadi, kau eh tu ?
Azman : Ha'ah, kalau tak aku lemas dah doe tadi. Thanks weh.


:")



Then when we wanted to get out of the water, EACH and every ONE of us, well most of us anyways, had foot cramps. My toe friggin bent 90 degrees downwards, how the f-k did it do that.




And other antiques :)







Al-Tudud


After we're all done and dry, we went up, only to be greeted with the sight of..




FAIL

Apu turned on his engine for too long while waiting for some of us to come up, and the above picture's the result. Sorry man :(


Later, we went to Eddy's house for some keropok's, kuih's and cekodoq's, they were nyummeh :9 .


Damnnnn, this day definitely marked one of the boldest circle in my '09 calendar, that's fer sure :)





Credits for the pictures :

Faye, Eddy, and few were editted by Mior :)

Chrome Bombs In Honeycombs

(Boomer of Left 4 Dead)

I, feel, like, this, guy.
Minus the ability to puke bile at will.


You know what, I think there's a party going on my face.


Lately, I've been having untimely breakouts, (when's a right time anyways, unless it's Halloween maybe) . Alright fine, so at one phase of life, now deeply regretted, I've been not washing my face properly, imagine sleeping right after hours of sweaty late night skate sessions. Repeated a few days a week.

But now that I'm aware that my cheeks are now getting as bumpy as a bar of Reese's Nutrageous, I've been keeping up with my face-cleansing routine.

Now here's the thing. At one time, I felt that my left cheek's clearing up, it felt smoother than before while my right one's still moon-surface-ish. Alright fine, slowly but steadily I thought.

THEN, now that my right one's getting more presentable, my left one's acting up again. It's not like when I wash my face, I only wash right cheek on Monday, and left cheek on Tuesday and so forth. I friggin smothered it all over, like it was birthday cake or somethin'.

I shall put it like : Right cheek is party place A, got busted, then it moved to party place B the left cheek. Not forgetting the smaller parties too, like one time, one grew on the side of my nose, vanished, the next day,
ONE FRIKKIN GREW UNDER THE CENTER OF MY EYEBROWS LIKE A MISPLACED PINK NANDEK'.



WHEN WILL THE PARTIES EVER ENDD (!) . Mercy .

Parents (in the form of supple, baby bottoms) of the respective party hosts, when will you be home and whoop the asses of all the party peopl- I mean pimples out of my fahhh-ce ?


Sigh.


Anyhoo, this is just a sidepost of what's really coming. Saved it in my drafts oledi, just waiting for the pictures. So, stay tuned ? :)

Darned Drones Draining My Drink

HAWWWWMAIGOHDD, I am finally over with the most tedious assignment so far. Never have I felt an assignment took a toll, as much as this one. Stayed up til' 7 (7am, mind you) doing it yesterday, and towards the end of it, I can see black dots pulsing in around my vision. HOLY CRAP, I don't even wanna Google on why the f-k did that happen.

Then again, there's noone here to blame, unless Procrastination's a person, I'd surely tie him with C4's and throw him off a cliff or something. The deadline's on Monday, l-la-lasttt Monday. Sigh, Mr Lim, have mercy on me.

Mother, if you're reading this, have mercy too.

One of the other reason why's the assignment been dued to such an extent, is my inability to focus on being focused. I was like, finished with one paper (out of 20++), then I'd like walk around, check out the fridge, go online, and the ultimate time waster, take a snooze. The amount of time wasted, if used well enough, would've made me complete the darned assignment a few days ago.

Bottomline, concentration's the keyword here. I need to concent..Eh lookie (!) , a pwetty butterfly.

Holy crap, I'm screwed.

Brown Clown Bows Down And Frowns

I thought I've lost my wallet. Stopped myself from falling into a trauma and run around in circles by telling myself that it's not missing, it's just misplaced, somewhere, in the house, which I've searched everywhere inside out. Tried not to think there's a giant tear near the backpocket of my jeans, where I usually put my wallet in. Tried not to think of all the bloody hassles of having to redo everything :

My ATM card (and who knows if I were to do it again, it won't be the one with the cherries on it, I love cherries :( )

My IC (which I honestly, do not mind if I have to retake the picture, it looked more like a male maid permit, rather than an IC) ,


My "L" license (Sure it's still a noob L, but it'd allow me to drive)


Not forgetting the precious valuables that are inside :

Money (Can't recall how much was inside, but with the ATM card missing..)

My Exeggutor credit card (Inside joke, do not bother, but it holds a bit of a sentimental value)

OH , AND IT'S MY DAD'S OLD WALLET WHICH HE GAVE ME TO USE FOR THE TIME BEING, AND THE BRAND SOUNDS SOPHISTICATED ENOUGH TO BE EXPENSIVE :((


This gigantic proportion of a gut-wrenching dread, was finally cleared off when :



Rape the typo, I love cars


THANKS EDRA-, I mean Eddy, I DO OWE YOU A MILLION JUGS :D . For this, and for the other particular thing. Don't worry man, turn that frown upside down, we're here for you to mingle with :)

For A Nickel, He'll Tickle Your Pickle

Imagine this,


You're in a streak of fast replies, and when suddenly, this shit happens :

You want to type a simple sentence, as such :

"So, what are you doing ?"

Simple ain't it. you go type,

So, what are (the keypad lag comes in) y (5 seconds) o (5 seconds) u

It gets on your nerve so you go berserk on your phone's innocent keypads, SPAMMMMMRGHH

The screen pauses for while,

And then, the backlight blacks out,

Soon the backlight goes back on again, yeay :D

But, now your innocent message shall look like this :

Hey, what are yoskajdlsajdksndjlasjdsadnnasdkj


The screen pauses, yet again, hoorah


Oh and here comes the killer part :D


Your screen turns white as snow, and kapoot* , then the phone f-in restarts itself.


Noice (y)


Ooohh boy, the excitement doesn't stop there, oh no

Ready ?


The phone will then take around 20 minutes to half an hours time, for the phone from hell to load itself, YEAP, 20 MOTHEREFFFINNN MINUTESSSSS!@#$%^&



Finally after forever, your phone's memory finally loads. You type back what you intended to send in the first place,

So, what are you doing ? (Still with minor delays but that's okay)-> Sending Message -> Message Sent -> Delivered To (insert name here)

You let out a sigh of relief, finally you said. Then, the once fast-paced messaging to-and-fro combo, has now lost it's streak, as the receiver takes a longer time than usual to reply to such a simple message. For about 6 hours later, a message comes in,

"Sorry, I fell asleep yesterday"

And you're aware of the fact that, this repeats 5 to 6 times a week,

Yes, I know.

Breathe in, bite your lips, pull your hair, pinch somewhere sensitive, to stop yourself from letting out a death punch to the nearest living thing around you.

EH WAIT,


OH NO WONDERRR I'VE 6000++ MSGS IN MY INBOX, AND 2000++ MSGS IN MY SENT ITEMS, LOLLL XDD !!

-__-

But then again, this has taken too much of my time, and mostly, my precious life. SO, I decided, to finally send my phone to format it down to it's core last Tuesday. Yes, I did create a backup to every single message that once clogged up my memory like hairballs in a bathroom sink. So what, I just don't like deleting things permanently okay. It's like reading back a story if you read your messages from the back. And deleting one message is like ripping a page out. Keep the "????" signs on your head to yourself, I'm weird I know, but that's how I roll 8)


Sent it to Nokia Center in One Utama, watched a movie while waiting for the tech-wiz's to do his magic (The Shinjuku Incident wasn't all that bad, it was awesomee) . When I came to collect my phone, the bill came in to a whopping price of rm 400++ . WHATHAFAK o.o . He said that there were water marks in it, and the LCD's screwed up. But I think he just wanted extra commissions and a pat on his head by his Boss. I said, "Nvm lah, no need to repair, format pun format je la" .

Switched on my phone back, and THE MESSAGE MEMORY LOADED FOR A LIGTHNING 8 SECONDS :D . That felt refreshing. Haaaaah 8)


"You tauu, yr replying quite fast. Wow. Haha. Rasa Funny.."

Haha :)

One Hundred And Sixty Eight Nuggets

This is as random as Rick Astley, but since I've nothing else better to do (Well, I've my Typography assignment, but that can wait), I've something for you guys to not give a damn about :



Onesix-friggin-tyeight man (!)

The pictures above, both showed the statistic of my Google Adsense, and in total I've made a dollar and sixty eight sense. Boo yeayh ($.$) . And in the other one, it showed 168 impressions.

Haha to those who's not aware of the significance of the number 168, well it's just simply the glorious date that I, Ahmad Ashraf bin Romli, descended on planet Eart..Blegh no need for over-dramatic sentences to just avoid looking like I'm promoting when's my birthday and have this post to secretly be a reminder to bring me presents, I swear to god that is not my intention, what's my real motive is to just state that, my favourite number is, one hundred and sixty eight :)


To the extent, that I picked my phone number to be 01*-*6868** . Then I picked my email to be ashruff168, and ignore how I spelled my name, who would've known, the period of time when I want to register an email, is the time, I secretly was a fan of Ruffedge. Curses. Then, I got over-excited when the number on a sticker in my phone's CE 168, etc..

Then, this habit, that subconsciously has embedded in me, of counting, eating, taking, picking, kicking, touching, tapping, everything that's connected to the number 168. For example, there's a plate of hot, freshly fried Cekodok, I would stay restless if I've only downed 3 pieces, I will take another one, to make it 4. Why 4 ? , because 4x4 would give out 16, and 4+4 would give 8, thus, 16 and 8, 168. We all know that it's almost impossible to only eat 4 of those banana-tasting, oversized mole, then I would not stop at 5, but will at 6, because 6 is in the number 168, 7, yes, because 1+6 ( because there's sixteen) is 7, and definitely 8, because it's August. This will stretch to eating 16 Cekodok, or if I still can't curb it in, I'll have 24, because 16+8 is 24. If let's say, I had a little too much, and I've lost count, then when I want to stop eating them, I would have my final four, or any particular, allowed number. Or else, it's gonna leave my tummy restless like it's expecting Diarrhea.

For example, if I'm practicing a new trick, I always take try no. 4 or any allowed number, to be lucky, just so that it'll tighten my focus to properly do that trick. Or, like, if my dad already went "ACAAFFF (he calls me that), masukkk Maghrib dah nak dekat ni" , I would go "Okay Pa, kejap last, last" . This will then leave me, to try the trick, for the 4th last time, or if there's no new trick, I would just conclude the day with kickflip-ing four times. This is only two, of the countless scenarios where I would apply this concept in. Believe it or not, I even made an imaginary guide on how this concept works, and what just don't, for example, the number thirteen, sure 1+3 is 4, but there's just something about number 13 that's unsettling (or maybe because it's just widely known as THE unlucky number, d'uhh).

Bunch of bullfaeces I know, but it's already went down as a habit, I can't kick it out, and I'm not bothered to do so. I'd still be excited if I see anything that's 168 (especially in trivial facts or birthdays) . Like this one time, where my cousin bought some two teen mags. I browsed through and in the Horoscopes session, BOTH, celebrities that were featured, in the starsign Leo, had their birthday to be the golden 16th of August. If I'm not mistaken, it was Madonna and Vanessa Carlton (Hee, she's cute) . Coincidence or what huh ? 8) . Felt lucky throughout the whole darned day.

Haha don't worry, I won't take it to extreme heights like, going to Sports Toto and go bet on number 1688, or 1681, 1686, etc, and go dig up a corpse and melt some chin oil or shit. Altho, I won't be surprised if I'd fork out a few hundred thousand bucks just so that my number plate will look like this ASH 168. HAHA . Neh. But do expect future random posts involving interesting encounters of the number 168 :)



ONE HUNDRED SIXTY EIGHT...OF GLORRYYYYY (!) *inside joke

Dangnangit, I've too much free time.