Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Damned Dame Of Dimsdalle

One of these days, this, THIS, would drag me down a spiraling abyss of pitch-black despair. Which I'll never be able to get up from, or see sunlight ever again. Or see that ray of sun, as a radioactive beam of skin-melting damnation.

Not that I'm already sitting in one shady corner, slitting my wrist and writing bad poetry with the black blood I bleed, or am I intending so. But there's this thing that's recently has been involuntarily, controlling the major part of my brain. The part where you rationalize and sort out things with logic.

But , since things you would normally derive from logic has been contradicting itself now, you have to be extra careful. And careful as in, stripping every living flesh of trust from the meat of rationality.

Or to put it simply, when you're as heck sure, have you never been this sure in your entire life, ever, that "D" comes after "A B C" , that's when suddenly "Q" or "X" pops out of nowhere and tuck itself just comfortably there.

Or like, preparing your tastebuds for the awesomeness of ice-cold cola, to only be scarred with a melting torrent of black, unsweetened coffee.

You get what I'm saying ?

Sure you don't, and let's leave it that way.

I still wish for what I've wished y'know.


Monday, September 21, 2009

Bold Bowl Blows Bald Bull

I used to really look forward to it. It's good to you know, at times, just to release everything and walk away with a dreaded burden lifted. At time it's easy, and at times it's pretty hard. But I know I'll pull on through.

But now that it hurts, real bad, I just wish that I won't do it anymore. But it's inevitable, it will just come by like a thunderstorm, rude and sudden. When it rumbles, something's gonna tumble alright.

Crap, I need more fibre.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Pins And Ponies In Penny's Pantry

*Just so you know, this a part two of this . Or you can just scroll down.


Holy shit, this is super-super late, I know. You've all the right in all of cosmos to still hold up that snot covered middle finger, and shake it more vigorously this time. I'm sorry, time and inspiration were being total bitches and won't let me pass through my writer's block. So, close the lights, light some candles, shave your eyebrows or whatever to get you into the appropriate vibe.

So here it is, part friggin two :

While we were all pushing Pithang's car back to life, I stole a few glances to the darkness behind me. Why I did that was beyond myself, I swore curiosity and idiocy were the ones that jerked my neck's reflex. Luckily, there was no one smiling, and waving us goodbye. As soon as the engine started up, we all scurried inside the car and got out from the place like it's gonna explode. I surely felt it in my head that there's suddenly gonna be a faint chuckle coming out from the darkest corner of the house that soon heightens to a maniacal, almost hysteria-like howl as the words "To be continued" slowly becomes clearer on the screen.

Haziq, known for his awesome skateboardship, was also known for his undeniable ability of spacing out into nothingness. And did he space out. So spaced out he was, that Nabil had to shout his name twice for him to snap away from his termenung trance. That's when he said restlessly that he can't get the image out of his mind. What image ? . The image of ,

A huge stain of dried up crimson blood, splattered across the bathroom floor.

And no, that's not some emocore lyrics I just pasted, he really said he saw what he said he saw.

And being the Uncle Seekers we all are, we started to make assumptions, what could the blood had come from. Haziq guessed, the aftermath of a bloody murder. But it can't be because the blood was only on the floor, if there was an actual bloodshed, blood would be everywhere in the doggamned cubicle, or trails leading to a place our balls won't let us follow. So, the next best guess was a rubber-less mistake ; someone had an abortion. Because the blood was near walls of which, the supposed-to-be-mom, would comfortably lean her back against it. But hey, that's just us.

We gathered at Kayu at The Curve to have our Sahur. Sleepy Mamak's on the end of their shifts, made me and Haziq to have our roti telur on the edge of sahur time. Anyways, I did tell in part one, that only Haziq Menung, Apek Max and Aiq Romero saw the blood stain.

We were all in it together, so we all should see the blood patch together right ? . Yeap, we can't spell team without meat(?) can't we. So, we planned another visit to the place one more time.

Anyways, we needed a rest, so we hanged around Shell for a while.

Sleep deprived teenagers running on left-over adrenaline, given an empty petrol station and a free street to roam would normally fruit consequences such as :

Don't try this at home kids, or with people around.

And other antics such as Nabil got ditched when he was taking a crap, and his pants was in the car. Experimenting fashion with jeans tucked into socks. And getting excited seeing, and chasing a bird that just wouldn't goddarned fly. Not that he couldn't , he's just lazy.

Sock'em to em


How did a splatter of blood, lead to a bouncing birdy ? .

By the way, I gotta be honest with yeh. As you would logically guess, the sun had already risen, and our balls had grew back to normal.

Anyways, our next spot ;

A lone house just beside the highway near Damansara Perdana.

The spot is said to have been featured in Seekers, so you know you're in for some serious shit. And boy, am I right ; There had been shit alright. Bat shit. Loads of it. Decorating every inch of the floor and debris. Walking on tip-toes isn't exactly the manliest looking thing to compliment your smug of bravery. But I ain't gonna shit-stain my shoes.

Other than the bountiful bat brown blobs, there were also a bunch of actual bats, searing above a mere inches above our heads with vengeance. VENGEANCE I TELL YOU. As displayed by one of the most epic video in the history of pants moistening scream.

Look at Pithang and how cool and calm he is, walking about the room like a real man.
"Ah he'll be fine" as I let him be with his balls of steel while I join the rest of the gro..


A blood curdling, gender-altering scream suddenly came out of nowhere, as a familiar figure sprinted out of the room with his hands clutching his head. Oh shit, what did he saw to make a man of his magnitude to burst into an ear-splitting scream ? A decomposed, maggoty body wrapped in a bag ? , A woman in blood-stained white cloth with long unruly hair, or a leprechaun humping a pink chihuahua ?

Turned out, when he was heroically opening a closet door or something, a battalion of bats suddenly burst out from there into his face, making him to totally go from heroic, to hysterics. From us being super shit serious, to be all giggly, giggling in guilt.

If you continue on the video, let's say around 2:15, you will see this and your laughing will immediately put to a halt..


A critter's skull, a dog's perhaps, just laying there in the middle of the room, coldly staring at us with it's eyeless bony socket. Watching, judging our every move. If a dog died there naturally, then where are the rest of the skeletal remains ? . A black metal ritual that someone forgot to clean up after ? , of what's left from a redneck's log cabin decor ? .

Your guess is just as good as mine.

The bats were starting to get territorial, so we got the hell out and finally went to Bukit Tunku, for the second time.

The place still looked pretty creepy in the morning. The vibe it radiates was something like "Oh how nice it is for all of you to come back" , said in a very welcoming tone, but at the same time, it suspiciously sends shivers all the way down from your spine to your spleen.

"Oh how nice it is for all of you to come back, cookie ? "

This is the place :

Come innn.

Remember the stairs that lead to your darkest nightmares ?
Well, it ain't too dark now.

Tengok Haziq termenung

Alright Pithang, no bats.

EP coming out in November.

Long story short, here's the video of our tour :

And not forgetting :

The blood splat I kept talking about,

Fine, it might just be a bad piping. But then again, it's a bit too thick, and a lot of dust have accumulated over the time must had darken it. And have you ever left blood to dry and clot, and noticed the colour ? . Yeah, my thought exactly.

You be the judge.

The morning's still young, and our eyelids aren't showing signs of slowing down yet. So we went up the "Bukit 3D" for our little morning stroll. Bukit 3D is because, like in old racing video games, even if you're moving forward, the background stays still like painted cardboard.

Brakebroke Mountain.

All the houses, were pretty much all the same. It's almost like re-entering the same house three times. I'd post videos again, but it's gonna get heavy as post-raya weight gains.
So here are the highlights ;

There was this door. OR MORE LIKE THE DOOR OF DEATH. 'Cause when you open it, this..


The stairs. that used to lead downstairs, had been demolished, making curious wanderers at night to go :

A: Hey, let's check this door ouUUUUARGH.. *Splek !*

And a little guess, which school the kid that used to live here used to go ?

Hm, awfully familiar colour scheme, amirite ?

There was a short note laying on the ground,

"Meeting with Izhar"

No, we don't wanna meet you Izhar.

There was a photo album too. The pictures looked very old , judging by the big hairdos and tucked-in shirts galore, it just might came from the 60's. Something about it gave me the shivers. Maybe the fact that looking at the album, MIGHT just be as equal as looking at the obituary section ? . IM JUST SAYING.


"Everything's great here, the weather's just nice and the flowers are pretty.
You know what, I wish you were here. It's quite lonely laying here all alone, cold and rotting. I know, I've a better idea, how about if I come to your place instead ? . Great. Give me ten
Alright babe, I'm here. Turn around ;)

Turn. Around.

Alright fine, it just wrote something about Tokyo, and I heard about Pithang reading Bangsar too. And it was in the year 19-f'in-90 .

And the last but not the least,

What would this ,

A chair with a gaping hole (that let's say, would fit both of your feet ? ) , placed conveniently
on top of a table.


This on the ceiling,

A hole that something had once clutched on it, made.

...would conclude to you ? .

Shit. Gulp. Gallon. Of. Glob.

There was this chair that was just right in front of a rustic mirror. I was so close to taking a picture, til', you know, reflection, you know. Full bladder, you know. Phone getting eternally possessed you know.

But it did look something like this ,

Mirror mirror on the wall, who has the wettest pants of all ?

Then that was it. We finally headed out. And just shortly after that, we heard a loud rumble up in the sky. We looked up and we saw a helicopter with a flag, and was spraying red smoke. GODDAMNN, MERDEKA PARADE. Never went to one since forever, and everyone was just as psyched.

So next stop, Dataran Merdeka.

We arrived at around 9, and guessed what ? . The roads where you'd expect marching bands and tanks to roll on, were dead empty. Maybe, it hasn't started we thought. Good going for the traffic polices to burst our bubbles with ;

"Dah habis lah dik, start pukul 8"

What the hell-ichopper ? . THAT, early ? . What about your Janji Melayu huh ? . Aight fine, there's always next year, and the next, and the..Shit, I really wanted to see the tanks.

We thought all hope was lost, til we saw this..


And we followed it's trails, and was met with this lot :

The pakcik in purple was the one who took this picture,
Would be awesomer if he's in this.


You know how I always complain how short the days are becoming, right ? . Then again, who am I to bitch, when all I do on such fine mornings, was sleeping, snoozing and snoring ? . This day sure felt like one of the longest day, and definitely one of the awesomest evaarrrr :) . Hope I will see the tanks next year (y)

Friday, September 4, 2009

Pens And Pennies In Penny's Panties

So, what did you do to celebrate our country's independence ?

Waved a flag til' your joints are sore ? , Screamed "MERDEKA !" so loud, you swore you lungs puckered to a prune ? Or go on a wheelie/wekang spree, enjoying the sweet breeze of national freedom, blowing against your ekor at the Dataran Merdeka ?

How about having your Merdeka spirit shattered by the absence of fireworks, and instead be incredibly pissed off by the inconsiderate jerks that should've went on that wheelie spree at Dataran, but instead threw firecrackers high up above a dense crowd, risking everyone a blazing bald patch ? . You guys really think it's funn..alright, a burnt patch of hairless skin is pretty darned hilarious, but hey c'mon guys, wouldn't be that funny if it burned a hole in your Timberland boots would it ? . Thought so.

Anyways, that was it. That was my so called effort to get into the Merdeka mood. Well, way before that, we berbuka at this some nifty seafood shack. Here are some pictures :)

We're so patriotic, even we had to choose a place named Merdeka,

Okay fine, it's just coincidence.

Ececey Aiqqq.


Cina Kalah Judi

Count all visible moustaches.

Jehan Miskin second from left.


If the first Agong had a mullet.

Yes, by coincidence, I had two butter prawns, and lemon chickens, on this day, and quite some time before. Pointless to point out I know, but I should say, those two dishes do bring back some sweet caramelized memories :) . You, who find this sentence to make sense, should know :)

A short Left 4 Dead session, then the disappointing Merdeka Eve, then this :

I don't know what came into us, but suddenly we all felt a tad bit adventurous. We went to a hill, further up from The Curve. Rode up the hill we did, and explored a dark path on foot, leading to a darker abyss we did too. This, triggered a few adventures to search for some spooked-up rush.

So, since it's Ramadhan, the thought of all Satan(s) are all chained up nicely lit a little light of bravery in all of us. I do stress in LITTLE.

And here to mention, we're not out to prove how bad-ass we all are against the other-worldy. I can assure you, if those "things" did play a little peek-a-boo with us, we, or at least, I, will go all Usain Bolt, but with a slightly wetter pants.

We're just a curious lot of youngsters, out for a motiveless search of cheap rush. You know the feeling where you just can't wait to get a glimpse of your high school crush, but when she's actually there in front of your face, your knees tremble, your lips mumble and you just want to quick-as-shit scramble from the place ? It's more or less the same. We all just can't deny the rush we get from the most pointless and stupidest things we do, but by the end of the day, you'll feel dumb, yes, but it will all ultimately be frikkin' worth it.

Anyways, after a few stops in between

Then we're off to our next destination, a house far up in Bukit Tunku. The place was dark and eerie, duhh. And it had this feeble looking, narrow staircase leading down to your darkest nightmares. Oh alright, it's just too dark to even see shit, that made you to assume your darkest nightmares are waiting down there, ready to shrink your balls to microscopic nibblets.

We walked through the abandoned remains, with Hazim, the most fearless among us leading the way. By only the aid of a cellphone LED-flash-light, we explored the shadows. After a handful of time exploring, we suggested that the house looked like it's built around in the 60's judging by the old-school-ish layout and style.

We then found a pathway, leading out from the kitchen to a collection of tiny rooms outside. We made suggestions that they were guest rooms, or class rooms, or dorms. Yes, we gave out opinions as we stood still in one place, instead of actually checking the darned rooms out, you got a problem with that ?

The most interesting find of the night waited in this small bathroom connected to what seemed, mostly like it was a bedroom. Everyone noticed a mysterious bendy straw in a tiny water glass placed above the sink. But only Apek, Haziq and Aiq saw the other surprise.

Towards the end of the exploration, Aiq suddenly became all panicky, which domino-ed us all to be panicky too. And of all the places to be all panicky, it had to be a narrow pathway which was missing safety railings. In occasions of falling down stairs to be funny, this one is not to be shitted with. Scars of cement impact would heal, but scars of getting up to only find out your friends have ditched you, would not die down even a day after a damned eternity.

Luckily, we are all still friends.

The process of LET'S-GET-THE-F'CK-OUT-OF-HERE-! was ruined abruptly by Pithang's car not wanting to start. If this shit's karma, and karma's a bitch, this bitch is definitely the bitchiest bloody bitch to ever bitch around Karmaville (shit made up once more).

It got moving eventually, and later in the car only Haziq revealed what he saw; you know the other surprise ? . He said, he friggin saw..

Your Mom.

OKAY OKAAYYY I'M SOOORYYYYY. Was just try'na ease the tension y'know. He saw..

A bunch of snot covered middle fingers waving in the air in front of my face, as this is gonna be continued in part two.

He He He :D

No, but really. This post is getting too long, and it's gonna be real heavy if it's all smushhed up in here. Partwo's gonna be worth it(?) , with videos and stuff :)

And not to be forgotten,

Happy birthday to our Merdeka boy,

Haziq Nazli

Termenung-menung lah selalu :)