Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Blue Heu To Boo Who.



For a guy who updates his blog as often as a hobo changes his underwear and suddenly gets bothered enough into reviewing a movie, the movie has got to be something.

AND SOMETHING, DEFINITELY IT DOGGAMN WAS.


I'm talking about,




and if more specifically, in glorious 3D.


Little did I expect, the moment I put those funky glasses on, I left earth. I swore the goddamn seat propelled itself out of the cosmos, and into the jaw-melting world of Pandora.


I was literally silent and speechless throughout the whole 3 good hours. Even if it's something you should really do in a movie in order to not have popcorn bits (and a possible thick, phlegm) stuck in your hair. But seriously, it has gotta be the tastiest visual candy I have ever t-eye-sted (GET IT ?) .

And as some of you might know, I like monsters with the infinite possibilities that applies into it. And basically anything that revolves around it, be it the habitat or how it sounds. I guess, this little loose screw of mine, increased my appreciation towards the movie a hell lot more.


Avatar isn't like any other movie. Hell, I don't think it's even a movie as it is more into being the most spectacular jungle-trekking/sight-seeing experience ever. You will, literally reach out your hand to grab that floating seed of Eywa, and feel stupid for just grabbing a fistful of air. YOU WILL.You ain't paying for a ticket to watch a movie, you're paying to get yourself lost in the wilderness of visual ridiculousness.


And I mean ridiculous. Ridiculously, f-in real. And how real ? . How about me being so goddamned sure that they are ALL excellently animated, (or in other words, Mat Confirm) only to realize later with much wtf, that there are real, human actors in it. That's right. The movie questioned my view of reality. You just might think, for a brief second of spontaneous thought, that there just might be actual blue dudes living out there somewhere.

Oh shit, wait -










Neh. Papa Smurf in the first picture turned blue for rubbing Colloidal Silver on his face. And the second, are just a bunch of guys that are watching you right now from the nearest window.


ANYWAYS, go watch it. In 3D. It's worth that little extra 5 +- bucks. Don't hope so much on a brainsquirming storyline.Be in for the CGI epicness. Or even if it's not on that, the dude, James Cameron took 14 years, and spent a total of 400+ million to make this. Show the dude some credit for spending a total length of a childhood, and the amount of money we're not even gonna get in a lifetime to spawn this masterpiece.








Put A Stop On The Top Of That Pot.





This might not make any of your last few seconds any more meaningful. But those who knows, knows why I just gotta. I just gotta :)

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Think, To Blink, Or To Sink In Pink Ink ?



You know what should I be seeing if my turn my head to the right at the moment ? . The mighty bumps of Gunung Baling, with fog hangin' round the summit. Instead, if I nudge my head to the right, I'll get my face blown with a stand-fan. Not that it isn't nice, but the point is, I should be in Baling, my kampung, right now. With the sweetest smell of the cekodok pisang's getting fried downstairs, filling the air. With the thickest Utara slangs being muttered so casually in the background, while us, town-tongues, would bust a taste bud trying to pronounce this sentence ;

"Hambuih hangpa semuo ni, awat loq laq sangat ni. Ketegaq nak mampuih nohh"


Or even a simple,

"Aiyaq ni tawaq hebiaq, macam teloq ghebuih" .

We were so close in reliving all that, but right after the Sungai Buloh toll, my dad's ride suddenly went all swervy like a sidewinder. A sidewinder's cool. But a sidewinding jeep that's on a highway of speeding lorries (Goddamn, they were fast, one even tried slicing to the next lane) is NOT. Not to mention the shaky steering wheel too. So, we decided to play safe and make a big U-turn, back to our house. Not obliged to shout "WE'RE BACK" in a correct vibe , we just crashed on the couches and mourn on the loss of a should've been a perfectly, well-timed getaway.


All of this mechanical mess would not have happened IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE BLOODY MECHANIC BASTARDS. I would not just assume and point fingers at the nearest guy in an oil-stained yellow jumpsuit. But who wouldn't done the same, if their dad paid 2000 f-in bucks, and have the car to be worse after it's sent for service, instead of the other way around ? . One problem, to the next. From an allignment problem, to a leaking gearbox. To a complicated-sounding mat kereta term, to another complicated-sounding mat kereta term. They were just doing shitjobs, ON PURPOSE, just so that they could milk out money from my dad's trust. I wish I'm wrong about this. But I've heard of so many similar cases to think otherwise. I hope each and everyone of the conmen would have bloody diarhea and have genital warts on their faces. And then explode.


So, my dad decided to send his jeep to his trusty mechanic, Liew, or Liu, or Leeyu, or Loyd. He's done all the years worth of upgrade to the jeep and my dad seemed super-happy with it, so we are pretty sure in trusting his trench-filled trousers.

In the end, we just have to go to Baling right after my sister gets her PMR result (alang2, all the (y) sis' ! ) . Let's just hope there won't be any other complications, or else, I'm gonna strangle someone on Omegle verbally. Although sadly, I'm gonna miss out on Tot's Mansion's Bachelor Party, but I miss my kampung too much to ditch on this one.

Again, do not send your ride to random mechanics. They'll charge you for shit they haven't even done, or the shit they have done. Either way, you'll feel like shoving a jackhammer up their oily arseholes.





Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Rate The Red Rat Right





One man, one can, infinite energy. Behold the sheer awesomeness of Redbull, and how it kicks adrenaline right into your limbs. Break the bounds of physics and time itself, as you take a gulp down. Chug it like a champion.

Starring :
Haziq Nazli
Imran Matin

A Last Minute Production :
Farehah Azmi (Producer)
Faeez Sabri (DOP, Editor)
Ahmad Ashraf (Director, Storyboard)

Not to mention the Hopeless Faeces, and the awesome, awesome crew members.

Rule your f-in world, Redbull.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Thy Sentinel To Be Slain.





Fine, I am not a pessimist. But we all got to admit that it's hard to deny the very satisfaction of venting out. EVEN IF IT INVOLVES TYPING THE WHOLE GODDAMN THING IN CAPS LOCK !!!! . But I will not continue like that, for it will annoy the crap out of you, and even myself. The term "venting out" itself sounds like the flow of gas, and we all know how good "flow of gas" feels like. Ooo, yeea-hh-heh-hhh. And more often than not, the release will usually bring undesired reactions. But who the heckth care as long as, at the particular period of not giving a damn, you feel like you've just punched George W. Bush in the face.

ANYWAYS,

Do I sound pissy ? , Do I sound like I'm choking someone with one hand, and typing with the other ? . Nehhh. Don't get me wrong, the whole day today was actually pretty productive, thus fun ! . But I gotta bring forth this one thing that happened today that left the blackest hole in my guts. I can't help but to pucker up all my insides every time this situation is recalled.

So here goes nothing,

T-TH-THHHE LAPTOPoo - Goddamn, I can't even begin to finish the sentence,

Again,

The laptop got f-in reformatted.


That was said in the straightest, tightest face I could muster, with a voice bordering on the tone of reading a suicide note.

Fine, wipe the "-_-" off yo' face. I exaggerated a lil' . But really, it's hard to wrap around your skull around the idea of absolute, unrecoverable, loss. The very thought of everything is gone. The pictures, the things I saved which are Error 404's now, the MSN convos, the transferred sms's, the webcam stills, the works, the notes, and everything in between, kapoof*, lost forever in the black, buttcrack of fate. How am I suppose to pull off the exact pose, with the exact face expression, at the exact place, with the exact people, with the exact memory that shrowds around that particular, captured moment ? . Or awkwardly, repeating everything I think I said the 8th time I chatted with so-and-so, expecting so-and-so to reply the exact same thing that so-and-so said in the first place ? . You can't repeat the exact stroke of your first circle, even on the 99999th try. Amirite.


You see, two traits that will never go well with each other even in hell. Being too sentimental, and having a knack for procrastinating things. We all know what a douchebag Procrastination could be. It's the other trait that I'm more worried about. It sucks to be too sentimental, that you can't help it. You can't let go off things that were once working parts of a worthy memory. This little plague of mine, can't be healthy. Just for the record of keeping it all sentimental, I've kept ; A used band-aid, An empty box of J.Co donuts, A small wooden heart, a keychain of Mickey Mouse's glove, a cup of black remains of what was once a rose, a hair clip, a Ben-10 cookie (in the fridge, c'mon), among other things. It comes to no surprise that I can recall the smallest details in the past, but not the biggest bulge of Captain Obvious from 4 minutes ago. Jood golly. This can't be good. I can't just flash the finger to the past, and ride off into the sunset like nothing happened. The past made me. It's in the future that, I want to know how the past builds up like a tower of Uno Stack'O towards how I am now, or later.


Holy bull, this is pathetic. I always go off track and end up sounding like a sobbing slit-me-wrists. Fine, my laptop got formatted. Get, over, it, Giddy-Mc-Clingy. Honestly, today wasn't all that bad. I shouldn't have a speck of reason in the world to be complaining. I landed a Jimmy Carlin's signature, I should be happy. Moooovin' on.


Screw all this useless yappings. I swear something's real good is gonna be posted up soon. And it's in HQ ! . So stay spooned :)







Monday, December 7, 2009

What's The Age Of The Edge Of That Ledge ?


IT'S

BEEN

F-IN'

AGES !



Sorry for the temporary death of my blog. Good Jolly, It feels awkward to get my fingers back in here again. Like returning from a very long trip and not knowing what face to put on when everyone's blasting off party-poppers into your face screaming "WELCOME BAAACK !" . An attempt to make a shocked+happy+"aw gosh, you guys shouldn't have" face will only invite the deadliest awkward silence ever.

Only now, there are no party poppers. Only the dead silence that followed the first moment I came in.

Anyways, if there's anyone reading this (say HI) , I'm sorry for putting my blog to sleep. First, it started as writer blocks, which then with the catalyst of procrastination ( how ironic ) , it then stretched out to be a longggggggggggggg poopy pause of pointlessness. Then came the assignments, which gobbled up all my time and shat out wet piles of mindfucks. I swear, I was on the very edge of sanity. Maybe, I'd go deeper in that sooner or later. But for now, let me warm up this typing tentacles for a while.

BUT NOW THAT I'M FINALLY FREEEEEEEEEE :D , I would, hopefully, update this a little more often and write more than 140 words.


And with this, I leave you guys with a little video me , Faye and Ilyas made for my Copywriting assignment, entitled;

THE MERDEKA MASSACRE,

En-joi





I have a more epic video in line. So stay doomed (y)